Shades of boredom (formally the reeducation of an axman)

It's almost over; there are lots I haven't written about since... I don't remember.
Somewhere in this story is the sad conclusion that I’ve come to and that is.

I don’t want to do Network management for the rest of my life… I think.

See computers intrigue me and I supposed if I could find a job that combines travel and music along with computers and working as a really good team… geez I suppose I could be describing being part of a band.

I’m rambling now aren’t I?

Test post to blog 1

Anyway this is sometest of this link to flickr thing... might be fun... donno...

so, where I am now? still biting off more than I can chew really. 3 months after being hired at TM I quit... I'm sure that outside work they are nice enough people but it wasn't the enviornment for me... sad I rather like the people I was working with...but that place was a zoo my grades suffered for it...some months later and I'm still trying to get my bearing back.

My Father passed away in that time, felt a little bad that I didn't share this in a mass email with my friends but it felt odd. But in the middle of this my phych teacher went really odd he gave a surprise test the day I was out and refused to let me make it up after a bout a few terms of letting this drag on he told me to write a report I then got a note from the dean that my grade would stand the way it was ...followed by a note fromt he prof. that he wanted my info to change my grade... gave it t him but it hasn't changed yet.

Kermit is fine and worming his way in to everyone's heart... well almost everyone Wendy got Married over this weekend... I hope it lasts she's a good gal and I don't ever want to see her hurt ... and the "speak now or forever hold your peace" part she yelle d whoo hoo! Wil behaved himself thankfully...

And last, but not least Sep 1st is when I start working CCI full time, ok I'm very aware that I hadn't mentioned it until now... but give me some time, I've alot going on now on top of school and well... we'll see. That said I hope I can reach NAY surpass the expectiations that they have of me here. Only time will tell

This is a test post from , a fancy photo sharing thing.

I've yet to come home and do anything but complain about work. I am disappointed with my progress there, I haven't , according to the powers that be been the most effective manager, there.
I start the day thinking that everything will turn out just great, we all work well as a team and then the salon owners come in and mess that idea up.
I leave as the clock strikes 7 and ask what happened? I was aiming to leave by 5, I've been there since 8 in the morning and it's not rewarding, and I don't see it becoming so anytime soon. It's now ten to 9 and I don't have any of my homework for school done, I wonder if I get home at a decent time like 6pm would that be enough time? Or would I just stare blankly at a wall dreading what my life has become?
again I see myself at this odd impasse, I want too do well at school...And then procrastination gets the best of me, sometimes I'm just a mess.

M

I've yet to come home and do anything but complain about work. I am disappointed with my progress there, I haven't , according to the powers that be been the most effective manager, there.
I start the day thinking that everything will turn out just great, we all work well as a team and then the salon owners come in and mess that idea up.
I leave as the clock strikes 7 and ask what happend? I was aiming to leave by 5, I've been there since 8 in the morning and it's not rewarding, and I don't see it becoming so anytime soon. it's now ten to 9 and I don't have any of my homework for school done, I wonder if I get home at a decent time like 6pm would that be enough time? or would I just stare blankly at a wall dreading what my life has become?
again I see myself at this odd impass, I want too do well at school...and then procrastination gets the best of me, sometimes I'm just a mess.

M

Friday I actually allowed work to get in the way of school, and I missed a class I am very unhappy about this. but of course it is my fault for letting it happen. On Sunday we came in to work to fix the office space.


The Back story
I was speaking to Ivan just before bed, about my inability or should I say discomfort about being assertive at work. He’s convinced that the minute I am I will find the place enjoy able. While to me another more “Safer” job opportunity might be the way to go. As it is I remain unsure about the job I’m in and weather I wish to remain there or not.
At any point I do see the merits in being assertive.



The dream:

Part a
My father wants me to race him around a track in the autumn, all the leaves are vivid and beautiful I’m a little white boy. I don’t want to race.


Part b
I know that it’s a prison; I’m told that it is.
It’s a long hallway type setting meant to look comfortable and low security.
One of the rooms on the right is meant to be sleeping quarter’s bunk beds the rooms are co-ed as are the bathrooms that are right next to the room with the bunk bed.
Some people are there sleeping,
They begin to try to convince me that this place is a prison.
And that what is all around me is an illusion.
They say to me and a friend? Who happens to be next to me that we are not truly educated and that what ever education we did have? Was purposely geared towards remaining in this prison, it seemed very “Matrix”.
We walked out of the room past the billiards room, and a room with a TV to a guarded door where I apologized profusely and mentioned that I just wanted to briefly see the light of day. As we turned away a young femme Latin boy showed up at the door, he was quickly beaten to a bloody mess by one of the guards.
I’m somehow on the floor next to him, unhurt but morning his death.

We had this woman at work leave today, she's been with the company a full 6 months now, wow what a veteran...wonder if I made the right choice...alas too late now... I really hope that that freaking check is worth it.